What happened has a name.

The shame is not yours.

A private tool to help put language to an experience that made you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, confused or powerless.

This tool is for adults and is not counselling, emergency assistance or legal advice.

One step at a time.

You do not have to tell your whole story.

Nothing is sent or saved. This tool does not make legal or clinical findings.

Start with the part you can name.

You do not need to tell the whole story or be certain. Choose anything that feels close.

Which descriptions feel relevant?

These are prompts, not legal findings. Choose only what you want to choose.

Here is what you named.

Your response to a difficult situation does not transfer responsibility to you.

You decide what words feel true.

Some language you may want to consider:

Optional. This stays in this browser session only.

What did it leave you carrying?

Feelings are real. They are not proof that you caused what happened.

The shame is not yours.

You may have frozen, adapted, stayed quiet, laughed it off, complied, left, reported it or told no one. Whatever you did to get through it does not make you responsible for what another person chose to do.

What would help right now?

There is no correct next step. Stopping here is also a choice.

Record only what feels useful.

Keep any saved record somewhere secure. A file may be visible to other people with access to your device or cloud backups.

You can ask for listening, not fixing.

Naming it was a step.

You do not owe this website, your workplace, the industry or anyone else another action right now.

Finding the words is a first step.

Name The Shame is a private tool that helps people put language to experiences of abuse, harassment, coercion and abuses of power.

It does not diagnose, collect stories or tell you what to do next. It simply offers somewhere to begin.

Why I built it

I am Mpumi Guliwe, a creative and founder of heiiist.

I built this after seeing how many people struggle to describe experiences that crossed a line. That observation came from listening to women in advertising, but it is also personal. I have experienced sexual abuse myself, and I know how difficult it can be to find the words.

This is my attempt to make that first step a little easier.

Privacy

Everything happens in your browser. Nothing you write is stored, collected or shared by Name The Shame.

What this is not

• Therapy
• Legal advice
• Emergency assistance
• A reporting platform

Feedback

feedback@nametheshame.co.za

This inbox is for feedback about the tool. It is not monitored as a crisis, counselling or reporting service.

Version 0.2
Built by heiiist in Johannesburg, South Africa.

You do not have to handle this alone.

If you are in immediate danger, contact emergency services. The links and numbers below leave Name The Shame.

These organisations are independent of Name The Shame. Availability and operating details can change.